How to get into BDSM?



Expert: Sharina Nicole

Question
Hi,

My question relates to getting into BDSM if your new to the concept, and have no clue on how to meet people.

Im 18, and a submissive ..
but I dont know how to meet people who like the same things i do, and its gotten to the point of not wanting to be in a relationship with anyone anymore due to not getting what i want ..

help?
please?

Answer
Red,

I have a few avenues for you to explore. First, welcome! It's a more interesting world when it's filled with kink and fetish...

I have a few web sites for you to explore. The fetish Scene web site has lots of links to groups and clubs in your area. Just make sure that they accept those 18 and over.

http://www.fetishscene.com/fetishscene/cgi/category.cgi?category=/a-canada&start...

http://www.ehbc.ca/groups

Fetlife is a web site I highly recommend. It is a way for you to explore like-minded people in your area. It is also a way for you to ask questions and explore your kink by making conversation in threads that are posted. If anything, you don't have to contribute, you could just read them, or ask questions that are weighing heavy on your mind. You may hook up with people your own age in your area who will know what groups or munches to go to.

You may find me on Fetlife under SharinaNicole: http://fetlife.com/users/130977

When you meet people online, it's easy to communicate and form a relationship. Remember, be careful if you meet someone in person. Make sure you make "safe calls" when having a meeting, even if the meeting doesn't consist of any play. Call your person on the outside, tell them you have arrived. Do it in front of the person you are meeting. When you are finished, call your safe person again and tell them you are leaving. (Do this in private) Call them again once you are at your destination safely, which would be home and make sure the person you met isn't following you.

No paranoia here, just being safe, which LOTS of folks do when they meet a new person no matter how old they are. It's just smart.

If you go to a group gathering, you will meet some nice people and then it will be easy to form some healthy relationships in BDSM. But, remember: people are people, no matter what the common interests are, AND it only makes it that much more risky, when the activities involve taking your clothes off and identifying as submissive.

I wish you much luck, and please keep me posted!

M Sharina Nicole